I often get asked, “why don’t you do bottoming sessions anymore?” or “Do you not like bottoming anymore?” Well here is my explanation…….
Yes I like bottoming, actually I LOVE bottoming. I love it so much that it was getting to be too much. Let me put it in a metaphor that I think works best. Imagine that chocolate is your favorite food, you love it, but then you eat it everyday and you just get used to it and it isn’t special anymore. Or imagine if it was Christmas everyday, that would get a bit old after awhile and it wouldn’t mean as much or be as special. Well that is what was happening for me. Too much of a good thing can make it not mean as much. So, since I love getting spanked and it does so much for me, doing it all the time and with everyone was taking the spark and the excitement away. It was beginning to feel more and more like work, so that when the opportunity would arise to do it for fun, I didn’t want to because it felt like work. I hated this feeling. I hated the feeling that something I once loved, and got butterflies in my stomach about, something I fantasized about and anticipated was there all the time whether I was in the mood or not. Something I wanted to experience with those I trusted and felt close to was something I was experiencing with just anyone.
Well, I still needed to make a living (this is my job) and didn’t want to continue to head in this pathway of being burnt out….so the logical solution was to begin to top. I started slowly and learned under my Mommy (Dana Specht) and Daddy (Paul “Tubaman” Rogers). I learned about different implements, techniques, and demeanor. I also developed a style of my own and a deep understanding for what a bottom needs knowing that I came from that place. Having a psychology degree and an understanding of the psychology behind craving spanking I felt I could be an effective top. I now have a large number of regular clients and I enjoy helping them very much through spanking. I went to school to be a helper, to help people and even though I am not a counselor or psychologist, I am still helping people and that feels good. So when people ask me, “well since you started as a bottom and are now topping, what do you get out of it?” Well I get the satisfaction of giving back, of helping those who need what I need/needed in my personal life, of listening to each of my clients needs and catering to them. Yes this is my profession, but I also enjoy it.
So my separation of topping and bottoming is now as such. I bottom in my personal life, to those I am close to and have some sort of relationship with, whether it be a dominant, mommy, daddy, play partner or protector. Someone I connect with as a friend on a deeper level than just an acquaintance. I top professionally. I top for sessions and in videos. I will however bottom for websites whom I have worked with before and have a repore with. I will bottom in videos on my websites with those mentioned above (the ones I have a relationship with) because it doesn’t feel like work.
So, in conclusion. I LOVE bottoming. I LOVE it more now than I did a year ago or two years ago. I love it like I did when I first realized I had a spanking fetish. I love it like I did before I ever had my first spanking, when I would lay in bed and wonder what it would be like. I love it like I did when I would sit in school and imagine my teacher taking me over her knee and giving me a spanking. Spanking has gotten its spark back. I feel rejuvinated and spanking has gained an important spot in my personal life once again.